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A Post on Poops

Published: 2023-08-24
Updated: 2023-08-24

WARNING: This post discusses poop. The good, the bad, and the smelly.

Before going to a plant based diet I had frequent heartburn, painful gas in my chest (that one time I thought was a heart attack it was so painful), and diarrhea almost all the time. I tried different OTC medications which may have lessened the symptoms from time to time - but never addressed the issue. I lived like that so long it just became my normal.

A plant based diet changed all this for the better.

Obligatory Disclaimer

I am not a doctor. I don’t mean that in the funny way like at the end of Brooklyn 911. I’m really not. This is an account of my experience - like poop - yours may vary.

Bristol Stool Chart

wait what??

I know. I was surprised too. There is a poo chart, it’s a real thing. There is even a Wikipedia entry, so you know it has to be real! It is also on WebMD and other sites as well. Including which is where the image below comes from.

Bristol Stool Chart

According the interwebs, the ideal poo is a 3 or 4 on the chart. (Side note: both of them being described as ‘like a sausage … #goVegan.)

My experience

Since going to a plant based diet I have been consistently passing a four on the chart. Don’t worry - no photos included. (Unless you join my Patreon at the brown level.)

Click here to learn how to join

OMG I am totally kidding. I have no Patreon, I have no poop photos. Sorry to disappoint.

For the first two weeks there was A LOT of four… but four all the same. Ever since it has been a consistent four. It is a joy to poop now. Every morning, consistent consistency, and no real cramping to speak of.

The downside ?

The amount of gas I produce is amazing

Seriously, I was not prepared for the amount of gas my stomach started producing on a plant based diet. It is not painful gas, it is not particularly foul smelling, but there is a lot of it. But it has also had benefits.

I work in an open office area with open cubicles. It is mostly developers or server admins and we are a very quiet bunch. With that in mind I usually like to go for a quick 10 minute walk a few times a day. A few laps around the building certainly is not bad for my overall health, but also a much needed time to release some built up pressure.


If you see me outside walking, wave at me. When I wave back, know there is a good chance I am farting while I do it. 😈